A Poem by Coyote Poetry


A rewrite from 1985



You were my wildflower dream. You were my wild dance and song, away from controlled life and wars I couldn’t win.I would of done everything for you.  You were my wild child who sang and talked of love and peace. I wanted to believe in your words.

Wildflower dreams are far away and today everything had become worthless. My last friend is near. I hold the Gin bottle tightly. Old gin kept me safe from your memory. Old friend gin. Always ready to cover-up my sadness and I drink the gin till the morning sun come to life.

I don’t know if I’m going crazy and damn demons keep coming for me. I go to the Monterey bay and pray for those gentle blue eyes and I wish to hear your sweet voice again.

I have become the dark Poet holding my old journal and a thousand stories about an angel who loved the sea, dancing nude on the Big Sur beach and loved to laugh. Today the ancient poet drank his gin and  photos of the heart dance in his head. He remembered perfect beauty sitting upon the rocks of Big Sur and the sweet woman told him.

“When you give-in or give-up all your real dreams. What is left? Johnnie, forget yesterday and live for today. Yesterday is gone and today is the opportunities to find peace in the land of promises that won’t break our heart.”

Old Word-man told the sea. Too late, too late. Wasted words and wasted love can’t be found when released. Free wildflowers are wild and free. They touch your life rarely and become wishes only. Today everything is my gin and the memory of perfect lady who loved me once.  Please kind and powerful sea. Tell my Beatrice I still love her.

John Castellenas/Coyote

© 2016 Coyote Poetry

3 thoughts on ““Everything”

  1. Fallen Saint on said:

    Quite true. Picking up the pieces is so hard…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Fallen Saint on said:

    Gawd this is amazing, beautiful and heart wrenching all at once. A very translucent poem, showing the depths of your turmoil and pain. It got to me. -Fallen xx

    Liked by 1 person

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