I don’t remember how you looked….


Dreams can become nightmares. Nightmares can become sweet dreams one day.


I don’t remember how you looked.




I don’t remember how you looked.

Your eyes were blue, maybe hazel green?

Your hair golden blond or maybe strawberry red?

I  try to describe you and each time I remember less.




Sometime I dream of grasping your hair,

our bodies fighting for the sake of pure pleasure.

You calling out my name, words of love.

You spoke only in the turmoil of sex.



I yearn to see you still.

Your sweet hello’s were sweet and long.

Our goodbyes were long and written deep into the walls of my heart.

I remember your long legs.

You dressed like a woman.

But had the hunger of a child,

seeking the education of the tongue, the touch and the long ride.



I don’t know if you remember me,

I still seek you.

Your hunger was to become mine

and my hunger was to touch you again.

I lost you on a cold Spring day,

I became old as you walked away

with tears and too many words spoken.



I released you for my hunger was to have you forever.

You were seeking a place to rest and get strong again.

Your wish to be free, was more powerful than mine to

in imprison an angel.



I still wish for a gentle knock on my door.

To hear your sweet hello,

fall into your arms again.



Life is only fair in sweet dreams.



I wish to see you,

to look into those beautiful eyes.

To remember how you looked.



John Coyote



1984/rewrite 2012