Almost California..

(Johnnie and Jennifer in Monterey, January 1992)

 Almost California——–

I was your Hemingway and you were my Agnes. We were free falling into a love that could never be. I wanted you forever and you wanted to be okay. A soldier love, held on by a whisper and a wish. I brought you to California in the Winter of 1992 and we drank Irish coffee on the Monterey pier. I knew as we held hands and talks. I saw our two world being separated and my sweetest miracle, running to new dreams. And I was alone.——

We kissed often at the San Francisco airport and I saw in your eyes, great sadness. You told me I loved California and thank you for bringing me to you. I watched you walk away with soft tears in your eyes and I knew. I would never see you again. I learn this day. The goodbyes not said shall break your heart forever.—

                         Almost California..

I took you to Big Sur,

we watched the Winter waves,

holding hands and knowing a kind silence.

We drank wine at the River Inn and

I watched your beautiful eyes,

enjoy the beauty of the river near.

We danced, shared laughter at the Santa Cruz pier and

I loved the joy and happiness in your eyes.

The carnival was alive and you waltzed on the beach with me.

I remember you told me.

You are too kind to me and I will always love you,

I will always remember you.

We drank the Irish coffee every night for three nights in Monterey Irish pub and we held hands and we talks of great dreams.

I held you so tightly and I heard you cry when you thought I was asleep.

I saw our two world falling apart and I knew.

Just smile, breathe in your words and make every kiss a memory.

I knew these days,  almost love was near us in California.

Today I know, I wasn’t brave enough.

I know no take backs and If I could.

I should of fought teeth and bones to keep you in my life.

I didn’t.

Dancing Coyote