Too late for forgiveness…
(My brothers Scott and Chuck. Scott committed suicide in 1987, Chuck committed suicide in 1988.)
Too late for forgiveness
A Poem by Coyote Poetry
A new poem finally. A sad one. If you feel death is more important then life. Please call me. Maybe I can help.
Too late for forgiveness…
My second brother put into the cold earth in 1988. Death by their own hands. The hangman rope more tempting than life. Left many to swim in bad decisions and not enough kind words.
The things I believed in. Became useless and not fruitful anymore. Words said without thoughts or kindness.
Left my soul in blackness. I wished too late to take back words that degrade a life of a brother.
I learn the important things we must believe are simple and plain. I learn we must rise and fall. Cry and laugh. Beg and demand. I chisel my brother names into a old Oak tree. I asked the Spirit of life and death to forgive me for being a bastard instead of a friend/brother. Silence and loneliness left me be to the solitude of pen and paper now.
I learn we are all mortals. Too blind to see beyond our own glory, our won story. Till names of the dead are carved into your chest. Today I remember two strong boys who showed no fear. The hidden demons no-one saw. Took them to a rope and no goodbye.
Their death made me more gentle in action and in words. The dream of wealth became less needed. Now I offer a open door to friends and family. I will listen to someone who is struggling and try to help. I don’t believe you can be forgiven.
Lonely graves of two scared boys are permanent scars on a mind and heart. No-one cared that they saw death sweeter then life. I wished I’d listen to a wise grandfather. “Nothing good to say. Say nothing. Negative words and actions can caused permanent damage.”
Better to be a friend then be standing by a casket saying a final goodbye to someone you loved.
Coyote
Wow, I am so sorry to learn of your loss. Our society needs to change in how we talk about (or don’t talk about) depression and suicide, more so every day.
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I agree dear Tiffany. Today suicide is a large problem. The kids are scare and need more suppose. I remember when I turn 18. I left home and I never returned. Ain’t the same no-more. Thank you for reading and the comment.
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Heartwrenching………….late condolences but they are watching over you………people need to be kinder in this world. No one knows the story of another as they know themselves.
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I agree dear Sara. We should be kind to people. We don’t know their pain. Thank you for reading and the comment.
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Very heartfelt Jonnie. Truly for your loss and for the 2 lives too soon to be gone. May love and hope instilled in you till the day you get to be with our Maker.
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Thank you dear Cassa for the kind words.
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my heart aches hearing this story for them, for you and your family!
Although it’s been a long while the scars etched in your heart are always reminders of the love you felt for them and do. Youth is known to ridicule and tease and I know if you could turn back time you would and they know somehow to Johnnie. My heart holds yours while you remember the innocence and sweetness in those pictures. love to you. ❤️❤️❤️💖💖💖💖
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I am so sorry, John. This is heartbreaking. Suicide never has an answer, never is the answer, but like you said, if we can be a friend it may create a difference in someone else’s life. Kindness is a must. Even in the darkest moments, we meet the horizon eventually; I mean to say how there can still be hope among darkness. This is very well-written and expressed, the grief palpable, unimaginable.
You will be in my thoughts. I am once more sorry for the loss of your brothers. Hugs, my friend. So much hugs.
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I agree dear Lucy. Suicide, a big problem in the new world. We need to teach our children hope.
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So many young lives wasted. Peace and blessings to you John.
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It must have been so difficult to live with. All the best to you and your family 💚🙏
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It was and it is still bothering the family. Happen, a long time ago. I left Michigan and I didn’t return for 12 years after their death. Thank you my fiend for the kind words.
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🤍🌺
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❤️
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“liking” this just doesn’t seem like the right sentiment to check off here but our choices for response are limited on this site… but all that aside, this is well done and very sad. I can only imagine your pain at loosing two brothers in such a sad way… but I believe someone’s pain that is so great to cause this outcome would not have been relieved by more kind words from anyone. Remember that Elton John song Vincent? these lyrics really spoke to me after a good friend ended his life many years ago, ” But I could have told you, Vincent, this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you” All the best to you my friend, love your work, as always
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Been 31 years now. Their death changed my life. I became kinder and didn’t demand perfection no more. I appreciate the comment my friend. I re-post these poems hoping someone will teach less, demand less. Maybe listen and tell the people near. We need and love them. The world is hard enough on the people we love already. They must know. You are their safe-haven.
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I agree completely. The world needs more kindness and love and then someday people like your brothers and my friend will find a world that is meant for the beauty in everyone.
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I agree my friend.
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🙏💐
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Thank you my kind friend.
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So sad….
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Suicide. So hard to understand. No-one knew. They were scared. No note, no goodbye. Just faces you see in old photos, Thank you for reading and the comment.
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