The wisp/the kiss….


The wisp/ the kiss, the memory. The Long Island ice tea…. Part one

He had traveled 1500 miles to see her face and he went to her home. He waited for her and he saw a baby girl dancing with his beloved. He saw she wasn’t alone. A young man came to her and he embraced her. He knew, he was the dummy who loved war, song and the highway. Soft tears fell from his face and he drove away. She turned and she saw him. He gave her a small wave and he drove to Ann Arbor. Her saw a great sadness in her eyes and he knew. He wouldn’t never see her again, kiss those rosy lip and put his face into her ginger hair. He told highway 35. Fuck it, fuck it. What is left for me?

He found the Washington street Tavern and he sat down. He ordered a Long Island ice tea and the pretty waitress asked him. Are you Johnnie? He smiled and he told her. The only one in the quiet tavern tonight Beth. Beth came to him and she kissed his face. She told him. You left Ann Arbor 10 years ago and I owed you money. You paid my rent, bought me food and paid my bills. You didn’t tell me. The Ann Arbor poet was escaping to unknown wars. Are you okay? You never allow me to say thank you.

He smiled at her and he told her. I am sorry Beth, I was running from my self and I found places so wonderful and beautiful. I learn from war and suffering of others. I had a good life and you dear Beth. You are looking so good. I hope you are doing well and your life is good. She looked sad and she whispered. Did you find Jennifer? I see a heavy sadness in your eyes. Johnnie, Johnnie. Life and love is never fair. I am fine, no children and no love life. I work here at night and I work as a nurse in the mornings. I have a house near the city now and I have a large garden. You taught me to love books and I have thousands now. What are you doing tonight? I have coffee, two cats and some beer. Please come with me to my home. I can pay you the money I owe you. I have a chess game ready too dear Johnnie. Remember you taught me how to play chess in the Winter of 1990. I have the chess game still and the books you gave me on my special shelf.

She embraced him hard and he told her. I won’t be good company dear Beth. He smelled her perfume on her neck and he rolled his hands through her reddish hair. Her brown eyes demanded his attention and he told her. I could use good company, coffee and some good conversation dear Beth. Okay dear friend.

She left the tavern at two thirty pm and they went to his Dodge truck. Beth smiled and she told him. You love the trucks and you have Texas plates. Are you at Fort Hood? He told her. Yes Beth. Almost five years. She smiled and she told him. I want to visit Texas. Maybe I can visit you in Texas and we can go dancing. We did dance once Johnnie. Do you remember?

He smiled and he open the door for her. He told her. Thank you for being kind to me. When all you have is the kiss, the memory and the Long Island ice teas. What is left? She told him, please Johnnie. Tonight we will play chess till the morning, drink coffee and we will find some laughter. Yesterday is gone Johnnie, today is here. I have two free days and maybe we can wander to Port Austin. Remember you promised me Lake Huron. He smiled and he told her. I would be honored dear Beth. I am on leave till the end of the month. I would appreciate the company. She took his hands and she kissed them. She whispered to him. I prayed for you and you are here with me now. My home is your home Johnnie.

They arrived at a small house. The house was surrounded by flowers and she took him into the house. She had a large book shelf and a chess table near the love seat. No television, just a large stereo. He told her. You have done well Beth. The house is wonderful and she came to him. She embraced him softly, kissed his face and lips many times. He saw soft tears falling from her eyes and he kissed them. Please dear Beth, don’t cry for me. She brought him to the love seat and she told him. You won’t leave me again. We will write, talk on the phone and I will become a safe place for you. You loved me once, you treated me like a little girl. You told me. Education, education and more education. Never allow a man to control me. You knew I was abused and you didn’t allow me to die. It is my turn dear Johnnie. Life is fair. You found me tonight because you needed someone. I am here for you.

 The wisp/ the kiss, the memory. Youth flies away… Chapter two…

Youth flies away.—John Gay

Beth set-up the chess board and she placed two chairs near. She went to the kitchen and she made coffee. She asked him. Are you hungry Johnnie? He told her, no. The coffee would be wonderful. She brought the coffee to him and she smiled. She told him. Don’t play easy Johnnie. I was told. I am a tricky chess players. You taught me well and I kept playing in the college library with the old men. I may kick your ass tonight. He loved this Beth already. He knew a nineteen year old girl wounded and scare. He gave her his back bedroom in his house and a job. He would cook for her, keep her safe. He remember reading his poetry to her. She became his editor and he taught her how to play chess. He remembered they went shopping for a chess game to many stores. He bought her a fancy one with beautiful artwork. Now the same board was in the front of him.

She studies his face and she asked. You are different Johnnie. You are not confused about life no-more. You have a old face now. Your face is like artwork. I want to touch each line on your face and know the story of it. He told her. Beth, you became a beautiful woman and you had done well. Your eyes are not afraid no-more. You have become a strong and proud woman. I am glad I could help you. You were a good friend. I never forgot you and I am sorry I got lost in the craziness of war, life. I got lost dear Beth. I loved the noisy taverns, I loved the faceless faces and faceless places  where you can be invisible. I befriended the people who had spend all their hope already. Spend all their laughter already. I needed the safety of being a ghost in a loud world. To and fro we can go dear Beth. Where we go honey, no-one shall know.

Beth laughed at his words and she moved the white pawn to center. You damn writers want to be Salinger or Hemingway. You can’t have both. Like John Gay told us. Youth flies away and it cannot be found again. You better taste life before you can’t. You have always written with a down-falling pen. Seeking and seeing the bad over the good. You write with the pen of glory and honor and you don’t seek anything but solitude. You believe you had enough war, you believe you had loved enough. Now you observe life with the crimson vision. You have always did. Don’t pretty eyes, pretty smile and pretty words excite your soul. She came to him, laid her head into his lap. She looked-up and she took his hands. She kissed them and she told him. The hands of stone need to remember gentleness.

He told her. Men in the shadows love to listen, may they will steal a kiss. When a man’s “Well” is dry. He doesn’t want to buy more memories. He had learn. Life is toil, love can be hell and he knows. He had outlasted the shit and he doesn’t want no-more. She smiled at him and she asked. Please dance with me. I have some good songs to dance to  and I remember you taught me the Texas two-step. I want to dance with you again. He smiled and he told her. My cowboy hat is on and my cowboy boots are clean. You are so pretty and I believe I have a few dances left. She took his hand and he put on Tim Mcgraw song “Don’t take the girl”. She brought her body closer and they moved two to the left, one to the right. two to the left and one to the right. She told him. You and I will create a new chapter. Where we can win.

The wisp/ the kiss, the memory- Jest of love… Chapter three…

Beth laid her head in his chest and he caressed her strong back and shoulders. He smelled her hair. She was a complete woman now. Once a slim, faceless girl afraid. Now a robust, beautiful and strong woman. He asked her. Are you swimming still Beth? You look amazing. Your legs and arms. Are solid and strong. She smiled and she asked him. Remember you made me go to the gym with you everyday. You made me eat three meals a-day and you bought me every book I wanted to read. I remember you would swim twenty laps daily and now I can swim 40 laps. When I was afraid, I slept in your bed and you held me like a child. You never attempted to touch me. He kissed her forehead and he told her. You were abused by someone, you were tired and I didn’t want to add to your burden. You were my butterfly. Getting stronger and learning to fly free.

She told him. The butterfly is wiser and older Johnnie. You won’t escape me tonight. He smiled at her and he told her. Love, is hard work and I told you a long time ago. Don’t give everything away. A woman kindness, a woman gentleness is a gift to a lucky man. the test of love is simple dear Beth. We want someone to adore us. The fortune of love is someone who yearn to make you smile, someone to weave us into a safe place where passion is alive and love never slumbers. Love needs reminders. A bottle of good wine, good music and a passionate heart. Love should be our best days. Sharing morning kisses, morning small talk and coffee. The evening warm goodnight kiss should never be forgotten. Love is tender and can be sweet. The elixir of love we must appreciate and give back with gusto and joy.

Beth looked sad. I remember 10 years ago. You took me to a apartment. It had a love seat, kitchen table and a bed. You had books on the table with a small stereo near. You kissed me and you told me goodbye. I didn’t know you would be gone ten years. I opened the letter on the table after you left. You wrote.” Here is $3,000 dollars and I paid the rent for one year. I have joined the Army to go to some useless war. Please go to school dear Beth. You have saved me from my sadness and I hope one day to return to see you again. Befriended you was my blessing. I did love and enjoy. Love Johnnie. Please have fun and be safe. Please be happy for me.”

She stopped dancing and she looked into his eyes. She told him. Johnnie, after your kindness. No-one could make me feel loved and safe. I knew you would return one day. I have waited for you Johnnie. Will you let me in?  He looked into her coffee brown eyes and he told her. I am not the same dear Beth. You are older and stronger. I am older and colder. I don’t want to break your heart. She kissed his face and she kissed his neck. She took him into her bedroom and she forced him on the bed. She straddle him and she whispered. Dear poet, time for you to write a story with a happy ending. You and I will find Port Austin. We will stay barefoot and happy near Lake Huron. I know love is hard but Johnnie. Being alone is harder. I won’t allow you to be alone no-more.

He brought his face into her breasts and he listen to her heart beating. He told her. Okay dear Beth. You make me want to know loco again. Maybe we can?

Dancing Coyote