Alone in the darkness.. I am hanging with Johnny Cash today.

Alone in the darkness
A Poem by Coyote Poetry
" Some people lose their way and can’t find real peace. "

                                Alone in the darkness..

The chronicle of life are stages. We can act many parts. We can be soldiers, lover, abusers and takers.

Sweet Peggy called me and requested me to come to her home. She was alone and scared. In the many years of knowing her. I watched her grow from a carefree young woman to a drinking and  desperate woman who confused lust with love.

Once we danced like free and content children. The world was ours to take. We were fearless and unbounded by the the challenges of our world. Today Peggy sat with booze and small dreams. She lost her great dreams upon the confusion of wrong turns and wanting too much.

She tried to blame everyone around her. I saw in her eyes. She knew she was to blame for where she landed. Lonely and in destitute place.  Alone in the dark she called my name. I went to her. I held her and told her. She would be okay. She  smiled and told me. It is okay Johnnie. I have learn to accept less. Love is for the lucky. Sometime we must accept who we are.

I tried to revive her laughter. I told her love will come when it suppose to. Perhaps some people never had the ability to love and hold on forever. Maybe our greed was stronger than our heart. Peggy told me. All I got is the desire between my legs. I need to be needed for a time. To feel I’m more than flesh and bones waiting to die and be forgotten.

I held sweet Peggy. Her sad eyes asked me. Was she truly alive or was she just another woman to add to my resume. I spend one week with her and we danced, laughed and I tried to bring her back. Her last words to me were. Thank you Johnnie, you still try to love me still. You want me to know joy and happiness. Please be my friend. I need you more than you know. You make me feel alive.

I left her to go to California. We held to  love on the thread of kind words and too much distance.  I lost her between war and travel. I wonder did Peggy find her way? I did learn. Love will come. Took me 37 years to know true love.

          Coyote/John Castellenas